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Why does my half-eaten chicken curry look like a cleanly shaven Randy Quaid?

Paul Kleinman



How is this possible?


Am I having a religious experience right now?


Is Randy Quaid God now?


Did God call it quits?


How did Randy know?


Did Randy Quaid choose me?


Is it because of my shirt?


Why is he cleanly shaven?


I mean, it is a nice shirt.


Is he cleanly shaven because he’s going somewhere fancy?


Is Chevy Chase around here too?


Are they going together?


Is my shirt going to be nice enough for such a fancy place?


Will my chicken curry skip out on the bill?


Am I going to go to jail for you, chicken curry?


How many years are we talking here?


Do I get a good lawyer at least?


Will I have to serve the full sentence?


Can I get out on good behavior?


If I give you my shirt, can we just call it even?


Why couldn’t it have been Dennis?

Paul Kleinman's first name means "small" in Latin and his last name means "small man" in German. As a result, he is incredibly self confident. He is also left-handed but throws with his right hand. On a side note, he doesn't throw much. And by much, he means at all.


A perfectly healthy sentence, it is true, is extremely rare. For the most part we miss the hue and fragrance of the thought; as if we could be satisfied with the dews of the morning or evening without their colors, or the heavens without their azure. - Henry David Thoreau


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